Have you ever moved closely with elderly people? People who are 90 +. My grandmother is reaching 90, but she is with my uncles and aunts and her needs get fulfilled as soon as possible. Here I am going to chart out the life of couple who are living independently in a remote village. The couple I am going to talk about is Mr. Raju and Mrs. Kamala. Grand father is 92 and Grand mother is nearing 90.
Their routine is little mind blowing. They get up before the sun rise daily. Cook breakfast for the morning. Idli and sambhar. She does try new varieties too now and then. Afternoon rice, sambhar and rasam with poriyal. Grinds rice for idli. Not a day passes without snacks in the evening. All the snacks which our generation will avoid as fatty food, is energetic for them. They don't have diabetes or blood pressure to worry about.
The dedication of grand mother towards her husband is amazing. After a long days work, grand mother gives massage to grand father's legs and hands. Whenever she gets any sweets or snacks from neighbours she always keeps a portion for grand father. She washes his clothes.
When grand mother was bed ridden with hip bone fracture, grand father did everything to her.
Today I ask Viswanath to do baby sitting on the week ends so that I can rest a bit and do my part of shopping. He helps me out in most of the household chores. But till today grand mother never questions him and does all the work all alone. She does that not as a duty but as a service and never gets angry if the work is more.
But life is a cycle, as people get older, they become like kids. When I met them a year before they remembered almost every thing about my family. Starting from my last cousin till my grand mother they enquired. ( I have 6 uncles and 6 aunts and more than 10 cousins. Even my husband sometimes gets confused with their names.) Even today grand mother remembers every thing. But grand father started forgetting things.
They have a son and three daughters with whom they can live with. But they insist to be alone. Grandfather forgets to pay electricity bill and ends up paying hefty fine. He forgets where he kept the keys to lock the house. He forgets where he has to go. We picked him up for my Brother In Law's engagement, he mistook it to my husband's engagement.
As in my old post, their tolerance is at highest level. When my son spilled the water and wetted grandma's drawing room, I got angry and upset. She quietly cleaned it up saying 'Kids are like God. You should not scold them'
At this age, won't it be wise for them to be with their son or daughters. But they argue that they cannot leave a place where they lived for 90 years. Practically their son and daughters find it difficult to assist them in day to day life. Most of times one's own life take higher priority and I could see the old age is neglected. When they are in need, they are not helped. With most of us moving out of our home town, home country to earn our living, this will be the same case for our parents and in laws right? Parents who live only for their kids all along their life, are neglected at their old age. Shouldn't we do something for them? Won't it be wise to live with them in their old age.
Atleast in grand parents case, both of them help each other. I wish they should both die together. With the kind of love and affection they are sharing, they should not live without each other.
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